A heart-pounding read. You made me root for Alex and Miriam. Hoping that maybe, just maybe they get saved at the last moment by those flashing lights but it’s not looking good.
I felt so stuck in an uncomfortable POV that was not comprehension except sensually. I loved that there was no reasonable visual and yet it was so so visceral , described through Alex” other senses, - smells, papery voice, sounds of chewing, mysterious lights and heat and dripping,—- was it all coming from within his own destruction , was it? or did he hear, sense, feel outer torment coming from Miriam or other unknowns as they descend upon his consciousness… as you said “ the unknown , the unknowable quality in this story keeps it just out of reach for Alex and frustratingly satisfyingly for the reader. I am so satisfyingly pissed off!!!!
I enjoyed this very much. I feel like you always deliver. I would like to know how long a story like this takes you to write, like from the moment you start thinking about all through to the moment you publish it.
Further, I liked how you played with the idea of consciousness and awareness in such a dire situation. It sort of reminded me of “An Occurrence in Old Creek Bridge” by Ambrose Bierce. 👌🏼
Thank you for the generous feedback! For this story I would say it took me about a week from idea to publishing, maybe a little more. Sometimes the best stories just flow out so quickly like they need to be told. I was inspired by a conversation I had with a friend who was having eye surgery, and he used the word "abraded" and I could not get it out of my head!
A heart-pounding read. You made me root for Alex and Miriam. Hoping that maybe, just maybe they get saved at the last moment by those flashing lights but it’s not looking good.
ahhh I know me too. I broke my own heart haha
The dangers of creating compelling characters!
So darkly excellent! Primal fears dragged right to the surface for display. You are on fire!
thank you! i’ve had a great creative month 🖤
Yup. You're the dark heart of Substack. Brilliant.
🙏
Mmm delicious. That gave me the bumps, err maybe it’s a rash. I dunno. Either way, it gave.
Wow!! Amazingly vivid. Not for the faint of heart.
😉
perfect for a grey Sunday morning
january deserves something brutal
This was amazing in the worst way.
Brilliant, EJ! What a sicko you are 😆💀❤️
😂
Whoa, I now have a brand new phobia!
I felt so stuck in an uncomfortable POV that was not comprehension except sensually. I loved that there was no reasonable visual and yet it was so so visceral , described through Alex” other senses, - smells, papery voice, sounds of chewing, mysterious lights and heat and dripping,—- was it all coming from within his own destruction , was it? or did he hear, sense, feel outer torment coming from Miriam or other unknowns as they descend upon his consciousness… as you said “ the unknown , the unknowable quality in this story keeps it just out of reach for Alex and frustratingly satisfyingly for the reader. I am so satisfyingly pissed off!!!!
you survived it!
So good—- horror through sensuality!
I enjoyed this very much. I feel like you always deliver. I would like to know how long a story like this takes you to write, like from the moment you start thinking about all through to the moment you publish it.
Further, I liked how you played with the idea of consciousness and awareness in such a dire situation. It sort of reminded me of “An Occurrence in Old Creek Bridge” by Ambrose Bierce. 👌🏼
Thank you for the generous feedback! For this story I would say it took me about a week from idea to publishing, maybe a little more. Sometimes the best stories just flow out so quickly like they need to be told. I was inspired by a conversation I had with a friend who was having eye surgery, and he used the word "abraded" and I could not get it out of my head!
So cool. It’s amazing how from such a simple thing, like a word or a smell, a story can sprout.
Out fucking standing.
means a lot from you man. thanks. 💥
I compared this to Evenson and I meant it. This was art.
you really made my month. and it’s only the first.
This is a superb relentless and vivid journey. compelling. un-put-downable ... so to speak.
thank you nick!
This was captivating and I feel like I'm mourning these characters as well as the little time I got to spend with them. Brilliant story!
thank you!
10PM, right before turning off the lights, is not a good time to read this story.
🫣
WOW. WOW — WOWOWOW. This is… it’s… good. It’s really good.
thank you thank you! 🙏